Well, hasn’t this just been a year? And believe me when I say, I know that’s putting it mildly. For the vast majority of us, accurately describing our feelings requires a degree of profanity that even I am loathe to write out in detail—mostly because this post would be unreadable if I did. Suffice to say, few of us could have predicted in January what this year would bring, and I don’t think any of us expected the far-reaching impact it would have. Life has been a long series of challenges—as it always is—but I don’t think there are many of us who would say this year hasn’t been harder than usual to roll with the punches.
In January, I wrote about a friend recommending picking a “word of the year,” and that I decided on the phrase “adjust course.” It was intended to be a reminder for me that no matter what obstacles come up, to take each day as it comes, to rest mindfully, and to try not to overwhelm myself with the long view. Some days it has worked better than others, and certainly there have still been times that everything has seemed utterly overwhelming. I set some fairly ambitious goals for myself that did not pan out, like writing a weekly blog entry, working ahead over the summer so I would have some posts ready to go for the weeks I didn’t have time to write during the semester.
I had high hopes for a lot of things this year that got thoroughly derailed by the pandemic and the political landscape. Aiden and I parted ways with Malcolm. Opportunities to volunteer with social service organizations went sideways, and working at a restaurant in the midst of all this was just…weird. Trusted confidantes and beloved people in my life aligned themselves politically with a President who actively undermines the rights and protections needed by the LGBTQ community, and the well-being of the American people at large. Harsh words have been spoken, and in some cases I don’t know if we’ll ever speak again. Even an abbreviated laundry-list of the ills this year has brought is challenging to write out, because it hurts.
We adjust course. We keep perspective. We move forward.
Aiden and I have both made the Honors List, and are on track to do it again. I got approved for an exception on my transcript; my old grades still appear, but do not count against my GPA, so I have the potential to graduate with a 4.0. Next week, I start the application process to transfer to the University of Illinois and continue my journey to a Master’s in Social Work. (I’m currently dreading writing my application essay, and have a dozen other assignments to complete for the end of this semester, so as always, I am making excellent use of my time writing this instead.)
I also applied earlier this year and was accepted to begin formally training with the Temple of Witchcraft in March. This is something I’ve talked about doing for over a decade now, and I decided now is as good a time as any. Assuming it goes as well as my academic pursuits have, then this will be the beginning of a four-year course leading to the Temple’s seminary program. I suspect that the outside accountability and formal recognition of my training will be a major motivating factor in how I embrace my spirituality going forward, and I hope to become more active in the pagan community as time goes on.
Tuesday this week, a former professor of mine who runs a counseling and academic coaching practice in Champaign reached out to me about working for him. The position has flexible hours, competitive pay, remote work, and will involve office work, occasional errands, and the opportunity to do work as an academic coach and assist with some mental health assessments and report writing while I am still in school. In essence, the dream job for a student working toward a degree and career in the mental health field. I accepted, filled out my paperwork today, and will begin training Wednesday.
Today, Aiden and I clinked mugs in a toast to the sixth anniversary of our first meeting. Who could have predicted that meeting at a Starbucks would lead where we are now? I can say without a doubt that I am the happiest I have ever been; we still lock horns sometimes, and we work together seamlessly the rest of the time. His love and support have been utterly invaluable this year, especially in the moments when things have been hardest.
The semester is almost over, and I turn 38 in just over two weeks. What a ride this has been. And every step of the way, we’ve adjusted course, trying to navigate rough waters personally, professionally, academically, politically, and socially. I don’t know what the next year will be like, and if I’m honest I expect it to be harder than this one has been. What I do know is we’ll keep moving forward, and we’ll make it to the other side, one way or another.
Stay healthy, stay safe. Blessèd Be.
Daniel K. Sheff 